Small Talk, Big Benefits

Living in and traveling to different places has taught me a couple of things. One of them is that small talk is anything but a meaningless time-filler. It's actually helped me make friends and meet the most interesting people. It's how I met my best friend in college and my husband (on-line small talk counts!)
I'll talk to people on the bus, waiting in line at the post office and when we're coincidentally walking in the same direction (it's more awkward if you don't!). Ilka Flood, author of enlightenednetworker.com, even met a new friend by picking up a call from an unknown and wrong number! Read her story here.

See that other person who's just standing around, doing nothing, much like you are? Try a friendly smile and a tentative 'good afternoon'. If they bite (return the smile and greeting, and don't roll their eyes or raise certain fingers), try a comment about the weather. Alright, I know what you're thinking. 'The weather? Really? That's the best you can come up with?' Well, Yes and No. Talking about the weather is safe. You probably won't step on anyone's toes, and most people can respond comfortably without having to think too much about it. Make it interesting though: 'Can you believe we've had snow like this for 5 days in a row already? Last year we had none!' is better than 'It's snowing a lot these day, isn't it?'

Try compliments too ('that's a gorgeous coat') or remark on the situation you're in ('Did you check out any of the airport shops yet?'). A couple of minutes of conversation can lead to infinite possibilities!

A Chinese model and me at the Yantai Auto Show in 2010

Do you use public transport a lot? It's a great place to have interesting conversations. I once met a young, gay, South-Korean man on the train. He had just gotten married in Belgium. He'd been living in the country for over ten years, and no one in his home country even knew he was gay. He was now considering telling his sister about it and going back home to see his family. It was such a moving story!

Ever gotten to talking with someone just because you happened to be in the same place at the same time? Did it lead anywhere? I'd love to hear your comments!